Depression feels like a lot of things to a lot of people. To me, it feels like getting into bed after coming home from my day job at 4pm and staying there until I have to get up for work the next day. It feels like being unable (or maybe unwilling?) to meet up with friends on the weekend. It feels like eating the same cereal for every meal because cooking is more effort than it’s worth. In the midst of a depression fog, I can hardly find the motivation to find a new show to watch on Netflix, much less find good porn and make sure my toys are charged and get myself off.
I finally went to the doctor in August of 2015. It took a while, but I got my meds figured out. I had energy to start reading on my downtime. I made more time for my friends. I stopped sleeping so much! But I noticed the biggest difference when I started my research for this blog. More orgasms made me a much happier person.
I didn’t keep a spreadsheet of all my sexy fun times in 2016, but I started in January of this year. And I found that if I had three to four orgasms a week, my head was in a much better spot than if I had gone without. I have an inquiring mind. What I wanted to know was why I felt a difference in four orgasms a week versus just one or two. Apparently, post-sex afterglow and elevated moods can last for up to 48 hours. Of course, this study was a self-reported study for those with partners, and all of my orgasms from January to April had been by myself. But still, I thought it was interesting! Four orgasms a week with a day or so between them would keep my moods elevated for the whole week, according to this anecdotal data.
I wondered if this study included just sexual activity (presumably PIV), but not orgasm. I didn’t want to pay for the whole paper so I don’t know, but the abstract makes me think it was just sexual activity. Of course, shame and guilt can threaten your mental health, but many people tout the benefits of regular sexual activity. (Safe sexual activity, that is. Internal and external condoms, gloves, and lube are your friends, people.)
Lots of physical benefits. Lower mortality in men, less pain associated with cramps and menstruation in women and people with uteruses, and even more confidence in your body and sexuality. Lots of mental benefits for me, too. I’m better able to deal with stress, I sure as hell sleep better, and of course, I’m learning even more about what I like and what I don’t like when it comes to sexual activity.
Of course, there are a lot of other factors that may have contributed to my elevated moods. I started going to the gym regularly again, work picked up and went more smoothly. And quite frankly, smoking pot helped curb my anxiety. Since it’s legal in my state, it’s been easier to keep a consistent strain on hand for panicky days.
I don’t have it figured out, but I don’t really need to. For me, more orgasms lead to better moods, and I’ll take whatever I can get to supplement my Wellbutrin.