Review: Creative Kink Master Beating Baton

master beating baton handle close upI’m picky about the things I like to get hit with. When it comes to spankings, the thuddier the better. I’ve written before about how the cane I have is much too stingy, most paddles seem to be out of the question, and honestly, even my partner’s hand can be too stingy at times.

Enter the Master Beating Baton. It’s a heavy delrin rod that I’ve nicknamed Thuddy, because, y’know, it’s thuddy. Thuddy is the purest toy I have in that it’s almost all thud. There’s practically no sting behind the strikes at all, which suits my fancy just perfectly.

This thing bruises like a motherfucker. Because it’s so thick and heavy, the impact it leaves is deep and penetrative. When you’re getting hit with this, it feels almost like a bad sports massage; very firm, very deep, and very painful. The first time I got hit with it, even walking hurt because the bruises were so deep in my muscles. It left a bloom of dark purple on my ass that stayed for almost two weeks.

When you’re using this toy on another person, keep in mind that you need very little power behind it. One good whack and I’d be out of commission for days. As with any new impact play, start slow! With this toy, there’s a very quick acceleration from “kinda hurty” to “really hurty” without a ton of change from whoever is wielding it. Unleash Thuddy on the tender bits where butt meets thigh and you’ll have some serious sensations with which to contend.

My partner has a few thoughts about Thuddy as well. First of which is the actual construction: he’s not a fan of the handle whatsoever. It’s some sort of plastic material, and he says it’s easy to let it slip out of your hands if there’s the slightest bit of sweat or lube present. Not ideal.

squared end of the master beating baton

Another sticking point for the both of us is actually the end of Thuddy itself. It’s squared off, which means that if I get hit with the edge, it’s painful, and not in a good way. Make sure that you use the center instead of the edges to keep your sensations as consistent as possible. I personally would have preferred if the end had been rounded off. I’m not sure what the decision-making process was there.

Though we both enjoy the look and feel; it’s very intimidating and provides a nice thud sound without too much of the smacking that can normally accompany spanking implements. With our apartment, I’m always thankful that it’s a little quieter. Until I get yelpy, that is. Sorry, neighbors.

This baton isn’t for the faint of heart. But if you’re looking for something seriously intense for the thuddiest of sensations, then this is for you.

I do love you, Thuddy. Even if you leave me bruised and sore. Because of it, actually.